God knows me best, that is the one thing that I know. But what I don’t know is why he does things this way and not my way, but then God lifts me up and I can see the whole puzzle, not just my piece I am trying to fit in.
Theses last couple weeks have been hard and I feel like a fat kid trying to run the mile. I see everyone once else jogging like they have been trying for a marathon and this is just their warm up, but here I am huffing and puffing trying to get round the first turn! Then I look ahead and see I still have three more laps to go. I cry just thinking about all the pain that I still have to go through to get to the rest of finishing this race. But as I think bout letting the tears flow out, I hear this wheezing of another runner with more pain then I could ever have. Now on top of the pain of this race, I have the guilt of thinking I am hurting when they are worse off! The weight is more then I can bare right now, my knees buckle and then a fresh wind blows past my face like a gentle kiss of a loved on, and as it passes by it kisses the sweat on my brow. Like a towel wiping off the mud, so was the pain of this race and refreshed I press on to make it around yet another turn.
God I know that I don’t know everything and I don’t know why I feel alone in this crowed school of Christians. I may never know, but as I prayed against this loneliness that haunts me in my days and nights, I thank you that you are more faithful then the rising sun. That when I am ready to collapse you send me a refreshing breeze to pick up my spirit and send it again on the race that you have set me to. God you are good and I thank you for that. I praise your name and bow before it. To God be the glory, the honor, the power, and dominion in my life forever and ever Amen!
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